Something I learned during my time walking through Afghanistan was that I loved the edge. I made sure to reach it as often as I could. As much as I loved it, if I went back there I would not be able to indulge nearly enough as edging is now illegal in Afghanistan. It’s hard to believe that such a wonderful place with wonderful people could be as restrictive as it became. I saw many strange animals (such as the Persian Jird – an interesting rodent) in my time out there but nothing that piqued my curiosity like the hedgehog did at home.

The hedgehog has existed before us and I have no doubt that it will exist after us as well. This strange animal was known of course in Scotland, Wales and Ireland originally in Gaelic as that demonic creature, that horrid creature, and is the hedgehog celebrated by Shakespeare:

“Thorny Hedgehogs, be not seen…

Come not near our faerie queen”

This may not be the original phrase that Shakespeare intended but instead from something of a later edit. The original phrase may have gone something a little bit more like this.

“Horny Edgehogs, be not seen…

Cum away from our faerie queen”

It was this version of the quote that truly inspired me. You see, I had always considered myself to be something of an edgehog. By which I mean, I enjoyed edging my hog whenever I had a private moment to myself in parliament. There was nothing quite like getting closer to a climax in the middle of Prime Minister’s Questions. Getting in between the nitty gritty of the Local Government Act to see if there is just a tiny bit of room to allow edging to become a part of how local government is done.

At the end of the day, I’d say that the main thing I learned was that it is hard to influence politics from the edge…

And I am hard from edging.

Originally published in Issue 61