In an innovative marketing decision NFTs are to target a bold new audience in the form of “LFT”s. As opposed to previous Non-Fungible Tokens these “Less-Fungible Tokens” will avoid the dastardly ctrl+c and ctrl+v that has swindled many an innocent cryptobro out of their hard-earned cartoon monkey photo by doing the unthinkable – creating physical copies of the art unable to be screenshot. That’s right, those less technologically inclined will now be able to get in on the action too through up-and-coming “irl auctions”. 

The decision was met with many mixed opinions on social media, from one avid twitter user stating “irl auctions are literally already a thing that’s just an auction please go outside.” While another stated “Don’t care. Didn’t ask + ratio”. It is clear that it’s too soon to truly gauge the public opinion of LFTs, yet we can only speculate increasing demand over time as many are displayed in physical photo albums known as “art galleries”.

Earlier this week we got the opportunity to speak to one of the first new LFT owners themselves at none other than York University’s very own LFT testing centre. When asked for a comment he said, “So I walk in for my Covid test yeah, and the guy looks at me and he says ‘first time?’ So I say “nah mate” ‘cause we’re two years into this pandemic I think I know my way around an LFT by now. Anyways, he takes me into the little testing cubicle and I’m sitting there waiting for him to give me the testing kit or something, thinking this is a bit odd. I’m usually done by now. Shit you not the man comes back with a picture of a fucking monkey. So yeah, anyways. Probably given you covid now.”

Our reporter was unable to gleam more on the subject as immediately after this meeting they were notified of a need to self-isolate for the next 14 days, due to an unrelated contraction of Covid-19. But rest assured it seem like LFTs are here to stay, with many sightings of physical copies of images to be found already all over campus.

Interested in purchasing an LFT? Head to https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/coronavirus-covid-19/testing/regular-rapid-coronavirus-tests-if-you-do-not-have-symptoms/ and look no further.

Q Cummings